CHICKENPIE.The Iran war ended. Nobody told Petron.
Every Tuesday, Filipinos wake up to a new pump price like it's a Wordle answer they didn't ask for. Last week: up P1.21. The week before: up P2.21. Diesel up P2.82. Kerosene got a rollback, because kerosene drinkers needed a win.
The government declared a state of national energy emergency. Which is government for: we know, we know, we're working on it, please carpool.
Here's the thing about declaring emergencies: it sounds like action. A declaration requires a pen, a camera, and a solemn expression. Nothing else. Marcos Jr. is now officially the steward of a national emergency involving fuel prices he cannot control, in a country that imports 98% of its oil from a region that spent the last two years on fire. This is not bad luck. This is a national infrastructure choice made over sixty years that nobody wanted to revisit, because revisiting it would require a different kind of emergency. Actually governing.
The jeepney drivers marched to Malacañang. Thousands of them. Buses, taxis, habal-habal. They want price controls, scrapped fuel taxes, tighter regulation of oil companies. They want what every Filipino wants: to live in a country where filling your tank doesn't require a spreadsheet.
The government's response, paraphrased: we feel you.
Between 1.3 and 3.1 million Filipinos may fall into poverty because of this energy crisis, per PIDS. That's not a footnote. That's a province. That's your lola's barangay, times thirty. That's Soccerena parking lots full of people absorbing a price hike they didn't vote for, can't afford, and cannot avoid.
The oil companies are announcing adjustments like they're dropping albums. Pre-announced. "Starting Tuesday." Professional. They've done their math.
Mr. Chicken is at the pump. Calculator in hand. The math says P1.21 more, again, because the Middle East is still the Middle East and the country still hasn't built that alternative. The receipt prints out. It says: Thank you for your patronage. It says this every week. It will say it next week too.
